CNN has a blockbuster scoop that Dark Brandon himself has instructed his campaign wizards to blow the doors off the universally held belief that Donald Trump is a sane, even-tempered, well-spoken statesman. No doubt when people get the news that the twice-impeached, insurrection inciting, convicted rapist facing 91 felony indictments who promises to use the vast power of the presidency to mete out retribution to his enemies is actually not a great choice for re-election the Biden team will sail to victory. Said one self-proclaimed independent voter from a focus group in East Lansing, MI, “wow, I had no idea. Trump comes across so calm and rational. But, on the other hand, Hunter Biden snorted sawdust I think. So… I don’t know… I gonna give Trump another shot.”
